the cutest girl, they love me...

Okay, I know, "the cutest girl they love me" may sound a bit, well, overly confident. It's really just one of those stories that your parents always told about you to your grandma and such ie, "emily did the cutest thing". it's one of the classics like "stink your head off" and "but not of pie". But hearing this one always struck a chord... It started a long long time ago..."The cutest girl, they love me! The cutest girl, they love me", those were the words my mother heard me singing, perched on a chair, looking at myself in the mirror. I was 5 maybe 6 years old, she says I still couldn't say my r's right, so I must have been about that age. And I had just gotten my first perm, yes a perm. I still harbor some resentment towards my mother for allowing this travesty to occur. I tried to contact the local CPS, but to no avail. They said that a) since I was 19 and not technically a child any longer it was out of their jurisdiction b) that the fact that the incident happened 14years prior meant that it would be very hard to prove, even though I assured them that I had photo's and c) that I was a little brat and to grow up, that one hurt. But none the less, there I was singing unabashedly into the mirror, smiling and believing every word. "The cutest girl, they love me! The cutest girl, they love me!" honestly, what kinda crap is that? Talk about full of myself. I don't remember this blatant display of narcism, so I really can't be held accountable. But really what kinda bull-shit were they feeding me when I was growing up to make me think for one second that I was the cutest girl and that everyone loved me? Now a days I'm well aware that maybe 30% of all people that I meet "like" me (and i'm using "like" it it's loosest terms), while 60% find me slightly obnoixous, 10% may actually hate me and that leaves me with the final 10% that do truely love me. Now the 10% that love me consist of those related to me (i have a large immediate family and fairly extensive extended one) and a few folks who have known me too long and now their initial annoyance has turned into something like love but maybe more like acceptance that i will continue calling them (you know who you are!). and maybe my 5 or 6 year old self would not have been happy with a measly 10% but the 29 year old me is pleasantly surprised.